If you don't slavishly read the comments on this blog....
You missed one of our regulars, Toast in the Machine, pointing out that today was the 17th anniversary of the day Bill Clinton was elected and I wrote my all-time one-day record of 78 jokes at the old show. Actually, the anniversary is tomorrow, because I wrote the jokes the day after Election Night. I know what you’re thinking: “Wow. Which ones did Dave do?” The answer: Zero. For years, the monologue at NBC was three jokes long (Dave got one note from the network when he started: Don’t be the Tonight Show. His brief, decidedly unCarsonian musings at the top of the show wasn’t even referred to as a monologue, rather the Opening Remarks.). About six months after I started in October, 1991, they expanded the Opening Remarks to, wait for it, four jokes.
When I started, I was writing 15 jokes a day, which quickly became 20, then 30. That was a comfortable number for me. But once Clinton made it official, I got in early and figured this day would never happen again. Churned it out from 10 am until he came up from rehearsal at 4 pm to shower for the taping. He put five or six of the 78 on cue cards, but I didn’t make the final cut. (As we speak, I am trying to find the four he did that night to show you what made it.)
When you right monologue, you learn to deal with rejection in bulk. Whether a guy does all 78 or none, you’re still a writer. That’s what I still tell myself.
The story has a happy ending. The next day, I scored big with this one (Remember, this is November, 1992):
Earlier today, Dan Quayle turned to his wife and said, “Is there an ‘e’ at the end of resume?”
Good times.
